In order to make it through the week, I have been telling myself "just one more week...you can do it". We are at the tail end of this moving journey that has totally taken over our life for the past two years and I just keep telling myself in "one more week we will know more". I know it almost done but I am so ready to be done that it's not even funny. We are almost there. House is sold but the new owners have not closed on it. New house is completed but it's still not done...it looks done but not done. No close date yet but once we have it...boom...things will start to move.
As I was sitting with someone today, my mantra with them was give up to get more. I was letting her know that she had to give up control to get more control. This is kind of what I need right now as I move through this new journey. I have just needed to let go of things so I could gain control of the situation. Maybe it would have made this transition easier, maybe it would have been smoother. I don't know but maybe, just maybe.
The other thing is that I have lost myself in the past two years. I don't really know who I am anymore. I know who I used to be but I don't necessarily know if I like the person who I am now. I need to switch it up. I need to make myself a priority again, start to care again, start to get excited again, and get that passion back. That intensity that really makes things spark up in life because I am tired of this. This is not working for me because I want to participate again but in what? I am not too sure but I want that feeling of living again, instead of just existing. To live, it means that the passion is there, the goals, the energy, and the determination. What I have now, is the lust to want to get things inline again but the self doubt in myself needs to just go...it cannot exist in myself any longer.
So here I am, looking for a new me. I have a new job, a new home on the way, and new adventures to be had but I need to embrace it with full arms. Kind of what Hubman did with his new change (hubman, you are amazing and thanks for your recent post on this). One more week...one more week...one more week...
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Mrs. Learning,
ReplyDeleteOne more week.....the cry of survival. Take the new start as a chance to reorganize your priorities. SM and I love our kids dearly, but we refuse to give into the hype or soccer, ballet, choir, etc. the kids each have 2 activities they re interested in and we draw the kin there. A young family and. Job can leave you feeling like"mom" or the "boss" more than the vibrant, exciting woan I know ou to be. Ake sure you are a priority in your life.
TTFN
Mr. No Name
Mrs Learning, Mr no Name is absolutely right You need to make yourself a priority. We all face challenges in life, and change can be a challenge. Take that challenge and grow.
ReplyDeleteWith all the change that's going on in your life, it's understandable that you've lost yourself. Believe me, once the stress of the unknown or the "waiting for it to happen" dissipates, you'll quickly find it easier to focus on you.
ReplyDeleteBest wishes my friend, you'll do just fine!
Alright Young lady it has been way too long where have you been
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