Bah!!! Today was a wake up call. Ordering plus sizes from Old Navy was quite the wake up call. I bought enough clothes to get me through the week for a bit until the weight comes off. It sucks but baby Learning was worth it. Another wake up call is my gaining at weight watchers tonight. I'm up .4 and Mr. Learning is up 2 :( it just wasn't our week. We socialized way too much this week. Last Saturday, we had some if Mr. Learning's coworkers over and the brews were a flowing. Then some friends stopped by and some more brews flowed. Then yesterday I took baby learning to meet some girlfriends and the cosmo's were a flowing. Yup, too much of a good thing can be bad. I vow this week to track all my points, I swear.
My six week check up is next week. It's been over 4 months since we have had typical sex. I just wasn't into having sex while pregnant because of the complications and my low self esteem. The pregnancy really hit me hard because I felt do undesireable to myself and to Mr. Learning. Mr. Learning has been getting a lot of oral/hand jobs and I take care of myself. When it comes to me, it's sexual but I'm not doing it out of horniness but I'm doing it because it puts me into a deep sleep. Anyways, I'm petrified to have sex again :( I am craving him but I'm sooooo scared. I had some tearing so I have no clue how everything looks now, nor do I want too. Usually, I would have been checking it out but I dint want to see the damage. Maybe, I'll get brave and check things out...maybe not....eek!
I have 4 more weeks off :( I love my job but I'm so not looking forward to the challenging road ahead. I have a long workday plus a ling commute, then I will get home and have to take care of everything so that's going to be exhausting. Hopefully, I can manage it though I really don't have much of a choice. I'll just enjoy my remaining days...then life happens. Lots of changes going on.
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Married couple back into the lifestyle after 8 years...
I think you're being too tough on yourself, you're just 6 weeks post-partum and images of Hollywood starlets aside it takes a little longer to regain your figure.
ReplyDeleteVeronica had some tearing with both of our kids, if our experience is the least bit typical you can rest assured that everything still looks and functions just fine :-)
"I will get home and have to take care of everything so that's going to be exhausting"- more putting pressure on yourself, what about the Mr, I'm assuming he's doing his share around the house, it's not all your job, right?
(BTW for some reason comments from you on my blog keep ending up in the spam folder, I'm not sure why. If you leave one and don't see it right away, that's why. I'm looking for a solution, I know you're not spam!)
Hubman-I am being hard on myself :( I'm trying to work on it and it's an uber challenge for me. Long term issues, insecurities, that totally popped up that flooded back go me in the past few months. It's that internal conflict that I have within myself since the 5th grade. I thought I had it put to rest about 7 years ago but those feelings are back. I'm using some therapy skills on myself and I'm feeling I'm getting a better handle on them but it will just take some time. When I was out to lunch with Mrs. Regular the other day it really struck me hard on how much I'm obessed with it and how I'm letting it eat at my core. Before when I was overweight it was due to my own laziness. This time, it's due to pregnancy, not laziness.,,there's a huge difference and I'm finally recognizing that.
ReplyDeleteAs for the hel, Mr. Learning is pulling his fairshsre andvhes a huge help. I guess I'm wondering how the routine is going to go. I'm this huge caretaker. I've always done the housework and stuff like that. Mr. Learning will help if I ask though he will not initiate. So you planted a great seed, I need to delegate ;) I just need to let him know what I need and he'll be there to help. He's a great partner....I just have communicate my needs.